Where You Left Yourself

By Dana Zillgitt, Regular Contributor September 15, 2015

Home has always been a strange concept for me. I moved a few times and ended up on the opposite coast from where I was born, and it always felt strange that I didn’t have any friends since birth; I just had family that’d been in my life for 10 or so years.

But coming back to the town where I grew up, I realized something. Home isn’t necessarily where your family is, or even where your heart is. It’s one of the most difficult concepts to define, but also one of the most humbling.It’s that cliché definition: you know it when you see it, but you can’t put it into words.

Home is where you leave your soul, where you can always come back to and where things get put back into perspective.

It’s the place where you find yourself again. It gives you space to breathe, to gather your thoughts, and to bring you back to your center.

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image via frauleinlouise.com

It took me the longest time to figure this out because I kept moving, thinking I’d find it somewhere new after I got bored or found a routine somewhere. I was a confusing nomadic, running away and losing sight of where I came from.

I was always on the lookout for something better, for something more than what was right in front of me.

I thought I had to be on a never-ending search for some pinterest quote you get tattooed on your forearm after a late night at the bar that explained what home actually meant to me, but I hadn’t bothered looking for my own definition. But when I did, things changed. What I finally found home I knew it. It didn’t matter how long it had been since I’d been there,  I was at ease.

I wish I could tell you home for me was some picture perfect house on the beach overlooking the ocean at sunset, but it’s not. It’s a convoluted hot mess of dreams, troubles, and a whole lot of complications. But it’s a place where I grew, where I made mistakes, I fell in love, and I lost, a lot. Every time I’m there, I’m reminded of my strength, of my perseverance, and most importantly, of the network of people I have fighting for not only my success, but my happiness as well.

Home isn’t only just where you left your heart. It’s where you left yourself.

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About Dana

DANA_ZILLGITT_writer_bio_(1).jpgDana has her BA in International Affairs & Spanish as well as a mild obsession with rescue animals and all things caffeinated. She’s mastered the art of the selfie, fort building, and even the sass battle. Plus, she can quote 95% of Anchorman and Zoolander.  

Every girl is a work in progress. If you need more help, click here.

 

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