When A Past Love Moves On

By Kaycee Wolf, Guest Blogger October 7, 2015

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image via playbuzz.com

I have been single the majority of my post-pubescent life. I have spent plenty of time alone and enjoying life. And I have never really had a problem with being single, until recently. I have only had two serious boyfriends and one was a lot more serious than the other.

My relationship that had been on and off for three years ended two months ago. He ended things. I still love him. He recently informed me that he is kind-of-sort-of talking to someone. What does that mean? Apparently, he wanted to let me know but it is nothing serious, yet. To me, it just seems so soon and it hurts to think that he has moved on so easily. I realize that he broke up with me and have come to terms with the fact that we will never be a couple again, but I still haven’t gotten over him. And it sucks.

I just recently started enjoying my alone time again. I’m fairly independent but sometimes it is hard to be alone after a break up. When you spend all your time and make a lot of you memories with one person, it is hard to readjust the picture without him in it. Hearing the news that he had moved on really hurt. I know that I must let him go, but I also want to know that I mattered to him. And I hate that his moving on has brought up a host of insecurities in me.

I shouldn’t rush the healing of my heart, simply to win a contest that no one is really competing in.

I don’t have any advice on what to do when feeling this way. Just know that you’re not alone, and (I hope) that this will pass. I thought about downloading a dating app because if he is moving on then I should too. I decided not to do so. I’m not ready. I shouldn’t rush the healing of my heart, simply to win a contest that no one is really competing in.

And then it hit me: I have to grieve over the loss of this relationship. I have to let myself mourn him and our breakup and then let him go. I’ve been putting on such a brave face for the past two months that I haven’t really gone through the grieving process. I don’t like to feel sad. I want to have it all together and not be broken hearted. But you know what? It is okay to not be okay.

I’m going to let myself be sad. I have to let myself feel this, so that I can move on.

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About Kaycee

KAYCEE_WOLF_writer_bio.jpgKaycee is a novice blogger living in Central Arkansas. She is a lover of music, writing, and a comfortable pair of yoga pants. Although an attorney by day, her recent quest for health and positive self-image started her blog adventures at http://www.voluptuousmisadventures.com.

 

Every girl is a work in progress. If you need more help, click here.

 

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  • commented 2015-10-09 19:10:45 -0700
    Amanda,

    Thank you for commenting. It definitely is a comfort to know that we’re not alone in this. It is hard, and I hate being sad so I tend to sweep my feelings under the rug which isn’t good. Thank you for sharing your story , and I’m glad each day gets better. I’ve definitely made a lot of healing progress, but there are still some bad days. Cheers to healing and progress and growing stronger with time.

    -K
  • commented 2015-10-09 18:47:19 -0700
    Wow! I went through this exact situation just a few days ago and it feels so comforting to know my situation isn’t unique! Thank you so much for writing this blog entry. It’s nice to know I’m not alone and that the sadness I’m feeling will pass. It definitely gets better with each day, but it’s hard to lose a love and watch him move on while you feel like you aren’t. Thank you for being open and sharing your experience!!
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