The scarf immediately caught the corner of my eye. I oohed and aahed at its perfect shade of blue. I could feel myself getting lost in the “I have to have this” swoon. I reached out to touch it and snapped back into reality. I recoiled my hand as though entering a trap. Wait a second, I thought to myself, why do I like this?
Upon greater reflection it turned out that while flipping through a magazine I had seen a very similar scarf worn by none other than Lauren Conrad. So, I couldn't help but rethink my motives. Would I have bought this scarf had it not been for Lauren's celebrity influence?
My psychological instinct and inner feminist tells me that influence does have an impact. Although I had taken the time to pull hard at my unconscious this time around, I was now aware that there were countless other moments when, completely unbeknownst to me, I was likely under the influence of others. I thought about how many times we look back at old photographs of ourselves only to shudder and turn away at our unsightly choice of fashionable attire. The all too common, "What was I thinking?" comes up like an instant reflex. What were we thinking? Is our choice of clothing an expression of who we are or who others want us to be?
While I am not immune to looking back at old photographs with that inquisitive reaction, I noticed there are also numerous photos in which I feel more at peace. I can look at these younger, awkward versions of myself without regret. Although I would never borrow that girl's clothing, I recognize that her choice of attire was fully her own and something about that feels really good. There is something truly comforting about self-expression and owning up to who you really are.
So, are you wearing yourself or someone else's version of what you should look like?
Check out more of Beatriz's musings by clicking here.