For those of you who haven’t noticed, it’s 2009. Many of us consider ourselves to live in societies of relative freedom, tolerance and acceptance — where people of all colors and creeds can live and work side by side in harmony.

On June 8^th this year, the far-right political group, the British National Party (BNP) won two seats in the European Parliament. No big whoop, yeah? What are two seats in an organization of that size? When the Party’s immigration policies include offering financial incentives and political pressure to persuade legal immigrants to leave Britain and return to their countries of origin — no matter how long they have been settled in Britain — and their membership excludes people that are not of direct white, British descent, then I think there is some serious cause for concern.

Nick Griffin, the leader of the BNP, is an incredibly outspoken individual with some seriously scary points of view. In a recent television interview about immigration from South Saharan Africa, Griffin said a way of tackling the problem would be to sink the ships bringing the immigrants. Another comment that jumped out was Griffin’s musings about Third World Aid, when he stated he did not believe Britain should be “obliged to subsidise the incompetence and corruption of Third World states by supplying them with financial aid.” This kind of open hatred is seriously troublesome in the early 21^st century.

Most controversially, members of the BNP have publicly expressed incredibly controversial views regarding the Holocaust. While most members may not openly engage in Holocaust denial, they have made insane claims regarding the numbers of Jews killed in the atrocities. Griffin has previously made comments such as;

“I am well aware that orthodox opinion is that six million Jews were gassed and cremated or turned into soup and lampshades. I have reached the conclusion that the ‘extermination’ tale is a mixture of Allied wartime propaganda, extremely profitable lie, and latter witch-hysteria.”

“There is no doubt that hundreds, probably thousands of Jews were shot to death in Eastern Europe, because they were rightly or wrongly seen as communists or potential partisan supporters. That was awful. But this nonsense about gas chambers is exposed as a total lie”

However, the population of the UK are not just sitting back and doing nothing to protest against the unacceptable views of this far-right party. The Hope Not Hate campaign, fronted by Nick Lowles is at the forefront of the crusade against the BNP, and social networking sites such as Facebook have provided the campaign with a platform to encourage the public to show their support. The Hope Not Hate group has over 18,500 members, and the 1,000,000 United Against the BNP group has just under 600,000 members on Facebook alone.

Watch the now infamous “sink the ships” interview. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8141069.stm

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Surfing isn’t just for ocean waves and the Worldwide Web anymore. In fact, in the world of the serious traveler, couch surfing not only facilitates matching free accommodations of a lone traveler with a willing host, but also serves as an international network of people hoping to seek and create a deeper sense of cultural understanding.

This is the mission of Couchsurfing.org, an online community connecting people with others around the globe by providing a sort-of matchmaking service for the true wanderer. The initial appeal of couch surfing may very well be the absence of a bill slipped under your door in the morning. But after scrolling through the testimonials and statistics of “positive experiences” on Couchsurfing.org, it seems that once you crash on the couch of a welcoming local in far-off places like Poland, Ghana or Jamaica, you may never opt to stay in a centrally-located, expensive hotel again.

Couchsurfing.org is the non-profit brainchild of 28 year-old Casey Fenton, whose full-time job is now keeping the Web site and its thousands of members up and traveling. As a registered member of Fenton’s site, you can request accommodations according to your planned travel route — much like requesting a friend on Facebook — and then, if offered a couch, a bed or even a whole room, you can connect with your host and secure your accommodations. You are under no obligation to host if you surf. Don’t feel like riding the couch? Then just register solely as a host. You can even simply support Couchsurfing.org as a project without offering up any space in your home.

Membership is on the rise among young, independent globetrotters who hope to experience more than the typical tourist list of things-to-do. These new set of explorers also are looking to stretch their travel budget. The art of couch surfing seems to have manifested into an underground culture of its own, complete with its own lingo, set of rules and a strict adherence to etiquette, gratefulness and most of all, adventure.

In a way, couch surfing represents a commitment to the human spirit by encouraging people to interact, share and learn from each other. It brings travelers closer to the real experience of a place so that they can reflect, understand and ultimately appreciate the true dynamic of their destination.

photo by ryan jesena

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A few years ago, photojournalist Rachel Harbut saw a video on the Tsunami that struck Indonesia. Compelled by its message and images, she showed a friend the same video. Equally mesmerized, the friend proceeded to ask her what had happened. Given that the tsunami tragedy was one of the deadliest natural disasters in recorded history, not to mention its status as headline news, Rachel was stunned. She says, “Not hearing about a natural disaster wiping over 230,000 people really says something about your world awareness, if not character.”

Inspired by the video, Rachel was on to something big. Her love for newspaper publication and passion for world awareness, left her no choice but to go digital. With just her laptop and YouTube, she started creating media presentations to promote world issues, educate her peers and encourage people to get involved. “I want people to know how fortunate we are in the U.S. and how easy it is for us to help. We have so many resources,” Rachel says.

Want to make a difference but don’t know where to start? Rachel suggests starting with the Internet. “It’s as simple as using Google. You’ll be amazed the little effort it takes to make a huge difference,” she says. Supporting an organization through online participation is an easy way to make a difference. Rachel recommends Nabuur.com, an online volunteering platform that links online volunteers with local communities in Africa, Asia and Latin America. Through the site, volunteers and local communities learn about each other, share ideas and find solutions to local issues.

Social networking sites are another great resource because they help establish connections and enable us to reach a global audience. Facebook Causes, for example, is a simple and easy way to make a difference in the world around us. “Use the Internet for good things and be a part of something that lasts. The Web’s resources can make a positive impact across the globe… it’s simple. It’s logical. It’s only fair,” stresses Rachel.

The crisis in Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) is one of the world’s largest humanitarian crisis and an issue dear to Rachel. This global issue is responsible for  45,000 deaths each month and reigns supreme for committing the world’s worst crimes against children and women. Considered the most deadly war since WWII, the conflict in DRC is in need of urgent attention.

Have the desire to help but find it difficult to donate? “You can still help even during hard times and the recession. It’s not always about money. Spread knowledge and be compassionate about something other than yourself,” Rachel says.

Through videos, Rachel hopes to redirect the world’s attention and focus of the media. “Don’t be fooled by the Britney Spears image. There’s much more to life than that. For those that thrive on peace building or just willing to help, here’s an opportunity to make a big difference. Collaborate with others, encourage healthy ways of living and promote peace. Don’t forget to share it with the rest of the world,” Rachel advises.

Check out one of Rachel’s videos:

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Japanese writers have been doing it for years: creating novels by uploading 140 character texts from cell phones. There are hoards of websites specifically created to house these updates, where readers can comment on the story, even ultimately directing the twists and turns of the final plot. The first keitai shosetsu (directly translated as mobile fiction), Deep Love, was written in 2003—and if this title elicits notions of gaudy or drippy romantic writing, then you would be right.

One interesting facet of this trend is who’s driving it: adolescent girls. Young girls are reading and writing these works in droves (Mika’s Love Sky was read by 20 million people, staggering numbers for any writer). Unwanted pregnancy, eternal love, rape, and prostitution are all popular themes. In a country where women are definitely considered an unequal gender, such a tool is giving more women a voice. With 20 million readers, you can bet that people are talking about these works.

In many ways, this trend is evidence of Japanese youth culture defining themselves, carving out their own genre, in the way that comic books, pop music and Facebook have for Americans. Traditional novels do not reach the younger demographic in Japan, but still they have found a way to tell stories that are relevant to them and, in some ways, rather important. While the genre has been questioned for its simplistic writing and lack of originality, at some point, writing becomes most important as a tool in relating one’s experience, even creating empathy.

So then, is the U.S. next? Using twitter is one possible medium, and quillpill.com has also capitalized on the trend.  American author Matt Ritchel gave the genre a twirl, using twitter to compose his own version, which he labeled twiller (that is, a twitter thriller).

But there are some inherent differences in Japanese culture that seem to be behind its popularity abroad. Japanese is a high context language, making cell phone novels conducive to the language. Sentences can be as short as one syllable in Japanese with subjects and articles often inferred. A two-hour train commute in Japan is common, whereas we Angelinos are more likely to try to sneak in a text when there are no cops around. Also, the cell phone is the primary form of internet access in Japan, while computers are more commonly used in America.

After reading a translated excerpt from Mika’s Love Sky and reading Matt Ritchel’s twitter history, I found there is something that is definitely different about this form. There is no flow to it; instead, it reads like small pops of electricity, each with a short burst of plot. It takes some adjustment but it doesn’t deserve to be written off.

What is definitely exciting is the embrace of new media to do new things, and to do them in different ways. Even if cell phone novels/twitter novels never catch on in the U.S, it is a sign of the diversification of such tools, and that people will continue to tell their stories.

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For frequent tweeters and facebookers, status updates loom in our minds every day. A public announcement that our day is one to be relished can give us a new lease on life, and a flood of responses to a gleeful anecdote can make us feel like the most well-liked person around. An old boyfriend’s chipper one-liner can conjure up ancient pains and leave us feeling like our insides are melting. The amount of time networking sites occupy in our lives is one thing, but what status updates are doing to us psychologically is an entirely new question.

“Twitter is unlike any other previous human experience with technology,” psychologist John Grohol writes in ‘The Psychology of Twitter.’  “There’s never been a time in human existence where people could be in a group, socializing, and at the same time, actively socializing with an entirely different group of people who were not in the room.”

How does this dual and dueling socializing change how we process the every day and how we make sense of our world?  Tweeting and FBing may seem harmless enough, but the more the fad catches on, the more it appears to be changing the way our minds work.

We use statuses as revenge on exes, we use them to gloat about productivity (often as a means for revenge on exes), we post quotes that make sense of the strange happenings of a particular day, we publicize our most private thoughts in the hopes that someone will give us a little thumbs up or express interest in our existence.

Status update compulsion creates the mentality that success, achievement and experience is defined by how others perceive us. It creates a heightened double consciousness, where we view ourselves based on the awareness our internet communities have of what we do. Status updates are creating a regression into the huffy-puffy reaction we all used to have to the school day saying that the reward for hard work is a feeling of satisfaction.  More than that, we are left with the feeling that you have not actually done anything at all until somebody knows about it.

Increasingly, Twitter and other sites are being used for business purposes.  But for young people, they are a public display of psychological evolution (and frequently devolution).  They are the way in which we define, present and understand ourselves, and it seems not too farfetched that this may be stunting our spiritual and emotional maturity.  More often than not, for those of us in our twenties, our status updates celebrate long nights, whine about long days, attempt to substantiate recovery from broken relationships and outline our newest beliefs and interests. Whether we are digging at someone who has wronged us or flaunting a cryptic inside joke, there is a common thread: we are now publicly mapping out our personalities.

There is our flesh life and what we make of it on the internet.  And yet, it seems for many young people, it is increasingly hard to tell which came first—the feeling or the feed. Status updates are turning the process of self-actualization into cyber-actualization. The question is whether this is opening up our minds and relationships, or damaging them by discouraging introspection and a relationship with the self.  Either way, the phenomenon will have huge psychological implications for generations to come.

For now, I have to go update my status so everyone on Twitter knows I’m writing about Twitter.

Tweet tweet.

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My pathetic attempts at LDR’s with boyfriends turned into hair pulling experiences for one blatant reason: lack of sex. I’m sorry, but one week of non-stop loving every few months? I’ll take one night every few DAYS, thank you! As Diane pointed out in “Long Distance Relationships and Why You Don’t Want One” friends are for phones and lovers are for…well, you know. But I’d like to give a shout out for the LDR’s with a longer shelf life; I’m talking about your BFF.

You’ve had countless sleepovers; there are shoeboxes full of notes written in pink Pentel beneath your bed; you share matching tattoos! And then she gets accepted to Harvard Law. And so you help her repaint the yellow walls of her apartment and you listen, and you smile, because unlike all the significant-others in your life, her decision to move on was not about you. You knew it was right because you agonized with her, you drove her to the airport after she cried into the lap of the partner she’d just committed to an LDR with – you weighed the relationship’s pros and cons, even as you felt your own goodbye rising in your throat.

Don’t fret, sweetheart. There is a bright future for friends who go the distance.

She’s just a phone call away. Whenever Jenna calls for an LD gabfest, Coel mock covers his ears and postulates that women speak in tongues unknown to man. Well, duh! When I make a BFF it’s because we communicate on a different level. Even though she’s going to grad school in San Francisco, one of the major pieces of our relationship is made easy thanks to Alexander Graham Bell.

We heart technology. Me and my LD buddies are fortunate enough to live in a world that is getting increasingly smaller. The sun of LA doesn’t seem so different from the clouds in Seattle when you’re getting help from that lovable shrinky dink: the Internet. Ah, lubricant of LDR’s across the globe, we all heart the web! Thanks to our culture’s increasing dependence on this medium, I am able to SEE my BFF’s birthday bash at the Dresden, even if I can’t BE there. And while freeze dried comments from acquaintances mean as little as “how d’ya do,” it is always a joy to read what my friends are thinking as they share the familiar routine of logging in.

Stop with the guilt already. I know. You don’t connect as much as you’d like. You’re allergic to phone tag and are more likely to post a drunken comment on her Facebook wall than send a weekly email digest. Sure, it’s different. Compared to the time we spent together before she moved to Chicago, my relationship with Cassy has seemingly fizzled. …but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Once I kick expectations to the curb, I can see our LDR for what it now is: undiluted, intense and full of love and respect for the frenetic paths we have chosen.

photo by melissa ann photography and creative design

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Ever been soooo into your new beau, and you just can’t seem to get enough of each other, and when you finally surface for air you realize *poof* all you friends have disappeared? You’ve stumbled into the tangled mess of an overly dependent, or “enmeshed” relationship.

Tiff was a great friend in college and early in our careers. She was the one who always called first on my birthday—the friend who never missed anything.  Then, about a year ago, she began dating Joey.  Slowly I started to hear less from her, as did most of our mutual friends.  Whenever she called, it would be all about her and Joey. She missed my birthday because Joey had a lacrosse game. She forgot to call her mom for a week. She had been so busy preparing for Joey’s surprise party that her mom called me asking if I had heard from her.

Tiff and Joey were no longer separate entities but a fused couple.

Experts agree that when individuals become overly dependent on one another it’s not a healthy relationship. Partners should have separate interests, the ability to maintain healthy relationships with friends and family independent of their partner, and, most importantly, each person is a whole, not using each other to create a feeling of being whole.

Overdependence in relationships has become more common. I am sure you know a few girlfriends who graduated college, got in a relationship, and before you knew it were completely different people. When people have trust issues, difficulty establishing healthy boundaries, or are dealing with major transitions, they tend to gravitate towards others who can fulfill those needs. These people often hold the same needs to be wanted and loved unconditionally, but don’t know how to do this without the “all or nothing mentality” of an enmeshed relationship.

Before you end up bound and gagged, here are some red flags:
•    Friends and family tell you your relationship isn’t healthy, but you ignore them.
•    You “can’t get through the day” unless you talk to your significant other.
•    You argue if your feelings and opinions aren’t the same.
•    You’ve lost contact with previously good friends and family.
•    They must meet your emotional needs in order for you to feel complete.
•    You share an email/Facebook/Twitter account.
•    You’re unhappy when you are not with the other person.
•    Your call/text message log is more than 75% from (or to) your significant other.
•    You’re unable to function socially when they’re not available.

Upset, Tiff contacted me a few weeks ago.  One of her best friends from college was getting married, and she had no idea until she saw it on Facebook.  “I mean we were such good friends I can’t believe I wasn’t even invited, let alone a bridesmaid!”  She said.

“You’re right. You were good friends,”  I responded. “But now who are your friends?  I mean you can’t expect to be in a wedding if you haven’t paid attention to your friends in years!  Relationships, just like friendships, are reciprocal, at least the healthy ones are.”

photo by david blaikie

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Read the first and second installment of Addicted to Love

Many love addicts enter a 12-step program before they are ready to give up the addiction. These addicts acknowledge the addiction, but are not able to stop the addictive behavior.

I was one of these addicts. When my ex-boyfriend left, I lost everything. My whole life was about him, so when he was out of the picture the screen went blank. I started going to Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) meetings and entered therapy.

At first, during the meetings, I just listened to all the love and sex addicts talk about their situations. I related to most of them — even though many were quite different. There were lots of young women my age and they were pretty and smart, as well as funny. Many were involved in the entertainment industry, including a famous actor. Although there were so many beautiful people sharing at the meeting, we all suffered from self-esteem issues (the root of many addictions).

I started to say I was a love addict out loud at the beginning of the meetings. I wanted to recover and be healthy but, at the same time, I still wanted my ex-boyfriend.

As a love addict, you are supposed to cut off all communication with the person you are addicted to. I did that for short periods of time and threw away everything he gave me.

My ex would always find a way back into my life. I’d make an excuse to call him or he’d e-mail or call me. We would get very close, and then he would disappoint and hurt me all over again. I went back to him — my drug — seven times before deciding I would really stop communicating with him. I finally saw the light. I just couldn’t give him anymore chances because he was not good for me. The high was just the love addiction. I decided I needed to make some boundaries and bottom lines (rules for myself regarding my addiction). I severed all ties to him — I defriended him on Facebook and MySpace and even blocked all his e-mails. I vowed not to communicate with him or check up on him via his blog or any other social networking sites. It sounds a lot easier than it is.

I completed therapy, and continued to go to SLAA meetings. I even introduced a few friends to the program.

My ex-boyfriend decided to start calling again last September. He was calling a lot and I did not answer. He finally left a message and asked if I was alright. I couldn’t handle all the phone calls, so I wrote him an e-mail. I told him very clearly that I was fine but did not wish to speak with him. He wrote me back a long e-mail. I didn’t respond. That was six months ago.

Once in a while I’m tempted to look at his blog and check up on his poker scores. That’s the addict in me. I’m not perfect — but now I’m healthy.

image by gustavo verissimo

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Finding time to physically relax has always been a challenge. I feel like my brain gets pulled in five different directions the second my butt hits the sofa. Some girls watch movies to chill out. Me too, though I rarely just watch the screen. I’m almost always knitting. Don’t worry. I’m not one of those creepily facile folk who can knit while reading a book. I look down for the patterns that are difficult and count stitches constantly. But I’m free to keep my focus elsewhere, both hemispheres of the ol’ noodle happily downshifting.

Lately, it’s socks that have been getting me juiced. When I last visited The Fiber Gallery, I got into it with a chick my age behind the counter – a rare bird in a yarn world dominated by grandma types – “I LOVE socks!” her fervor matching my own “Socks are like CRACK.”

Indeed.

There’s something so twilight zone about those Target 12-packs of necessities, machine made and expendable. What other options do we have? I love vintage…but socks? Step slowly away from the Value Village bin of underwear, please.

As a beginner, I can knit a calf length sock in seven hours, if not less. Now, that’s a lot of bang for short-term satisfaction. Among the needle crowd socks are considered difficult. Once you’ve learned the form, you can tackle any other project: sweater, hat, fingerless gloves. Best of all, those cryptic pattern runes will suddenly come clear. And unlike a hat or a scarf, socks are something we all wear everyday. At least in chilly Seattle, that is.

Lots of my friends knit and crochet, but there’s a great divide between their finished items. The difference is between homemade and handmade. Homemade is that scarf you made with random stitches, mistakes skipped over because who’s going to notice? This is craft for craft’s sake and props to you for playing.

I aspire to create something handmade: a sock that is better quality than anything I could buy in a store. Doubly so because I cared enough to do the best job I could. I used to say I picked up needlework to quit smoking. Now, it’s become so much more than something to appease these idle hands.

If you brought your favorite worsted wool to my house we could sit on Chicago (the name of my roommate’s giant microfiber sectional) and I would show you how to make a sock – the best way to learn being at the hands of another addict. But since I’m here in Seattle and you’re blinking into your Blackberry, let your fingers do the work.  Join Ravelry.com (basically a facebook for all things yarn) and friend your local textile boutique. Sign up for a class—most have them. Next you can queue patterns so hip “Jo-Ann” would turn in her grave.

The sweetest thing? Once your loved ones have received a pair of handmade socks, they’ll respect your hours on the couch watching Twin Peaks yet again. It’s productive!

photo (and sock) by laura mundee

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1. OBAMA IN BAGHDAD – IRAQ
Obama’s first stop in Iraq as president came at the conclusion of his first world tour as president – a noticeably different international diplomatic protocol than our former top man, George W.. Robert Gibbs, Obama’s spokesman, said this trip was mainly about the troops, to give them “our utmost respect and appreciation.” In addition Obama wanted to visit with Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki and President Jalal Talibani to survey Iraq’s current political situation.
Read more at http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/04/07/obama/index.html

2. G20 SUMMIT FLASH MOBBING – UNITED KINGDOM
Last week the world watched as the industrial powers of our world came to together to plan our market recession exit strategy. All eyes were on London as anti-capitalist protesters clashed with British law enforcement around the streets of the Bank of England. How did they get there? You guessed it folks – our Internet favorites Twitter and Facebook! Flash mobbers, as the London Telegraph reported, use texts, tweets, and facebook to organize impromptu gatherings before authorities can block their efforts… Long gone are the days of mass pillow fights and silent discos.
Read more at www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/financetopics/g20-summit/5090003/G20-summit-Protesters-use-Twitter-Facebook-and-social-media-tools-to-organise-demonstrations.html

3. EARTHQUAKE SURVIVORS BRACE FOR THE FUTURE – ITALY
A powerful earthquake shook the medieval town of Aquilla in the Abruzzo region of Italy. The earthquake toppled buildings, damaged century old monuments and killed over 150 people.  Many of the survivors were born and raised in the region with nowhere else to go. Rescuers set up tents, and handed out food and water to those left without homes. The panic of yesterday’s Earthquake has left survivors of the ancient town with a sense of sadness and hopelessness over the catastrophe.  At the same time, many brace themselves as they begin rebuilding their lives.
Read more at http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/04/07/italy.quake.eyewitness/index.html

4. FLEXING SOME MISSILE MUSCLES – NORTH KOREA
North Korea sent a shock wave through out the international community this week when testing their ballistic missiles that carried a satellite into orbit. In an interview with CNN, Ex -Secretary of State Madeline Albright criticized the US for not opening diplomatic talks with Pyongyang. Perhaps they would be able to figure out what exactly they are trying to do.
Read more at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7988939.stm

5. FIDEL CASTRO ASKS HOW TO HELP OBAMA – CUBA
An engaging and energetic Fidel Castro met with a team of US congressmen. The rare meeting with the notorious former Cuban president was held in Cuba in an effort to improve US-Cuban relations. Fidel Castro publicly ceded power to his brother Raul after falling ill in 2006.  However the three congressmen who met with Castro thought he was vital and asked how Cuba could help President Barack Obama normalize relations between the two countries.
Read more at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7988865.stm

6. A DESPERATE PAKISTAN CALLS FOR TRUST WITH US – PAKISTAN
President Asif Ali Zardari  called for trust between the US and Pakistan in response to President Obama’s new foreign policy agenda which will involve a regional strategy to defeat rogue militants plaguing Pakistan and Afghanistan. Pakistani officials were also referring to recent US drone attacks over Pakistan as a violation of their sovereignty. Though the US officials said they would not hand over the drones, President Obama has planned more than $1billion of economic aid for the country over the next five years.
Read more at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7986908.stm

7. ANOTHER SHOE ATTACK – INDIA
Just as the sentence for the most notable shoe attacker was reduced, another attack was staged, but this time in India. Palaniappan Chidambaram was in Delhi when a member of the press TOSSED his shoe at the startled minister. The Sikh reporter yelled, “I protest” and off the shoe went. Officials in the room gently led him away. This appears to be the new form of political protest around the world!
Read more at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/7987201.stm

photo by rob veo

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