By: Ashley Drummonds, Regular Contributor
The other day I was sitting at a local Starbucks working on some writing in a 12 Week transformation to ABS program (Authentic Beauty & Strength) for women. I was tired and on my third cup of coffee while feeling overwhelmed with the writing. I was also “pre-period,” which amplifies every emotion we ladies feel to result in a few breakdowns and self-pity moments. I was on the last few pages finishing the program working on the “Inner Strength Training” portion for those days trying to think about what you ladies and women all over need to hear the most to really feed your soul while feeding your body, and I kept drawing blanks the more time I spent on it. Do they need to hear about more nutrition or do they need a meditation? Do they need to know they are awesome and loved or do they need to know more workouts?
I stared blankly at my computer screen thinking the answer was going to just pop up and write itself, but of course that did not happen. Instead all I was actually thinking about was feeling bloated, feeling like I was back going through puberty again: break-outs, uncomfortable jeans, and completely overwhelmed. Ever felt like that? I immediately started to beat myself up thinking: Ashley, you are a health and fitness expert and you are not allowed to feel fat, bloated, insecure, or emotional. You are supposed to be writing all about ABS for these women and how can you do that when you are not even doing it for yourself! (Insert tears here) I am not working out anymore because my clothes don’t fit and I don’t care if it is muscle or just water weight from a period, I quit! Stupid hormones!
Oh yes, I was having a huge self-sabotage moment instead of self-love. I decided to tell you this because I think sometimes we all hold certain people to high levels in our minds thinking they have it all together or they “get life” and the rest of us are just wondering around trying to figure it out when the truth is we are all in this together. I write, teach, and preach to women to love and embrace their bodies all day every day, yet I myself struggled with embracing and loving my own this past week. I tell you that you are beautiful and strong and yet I struggled with telling myself this while sitting at Starbucks. The point is that there will be days where you “get it” and life seems perfectly in order and other days where you get hit with self-pity and not only can you not see your 6-pack abs because of the PMS water bloat, but you also struggle to see your inner ABS as well!
Guess what, it is okay! Even the most beautiful women in the world have insecurities and crappy days where they cannot see their own beauty, but this is what I AM THAT GIRL is all about: to create a community of support and love for and by women all over the world so that when you do have days like I did this past week you can read this story or any other story and know that you are not alone, you are still beautiful, and you are still loved. This is my sole purpose behind the ABS Transformation : to go on a journey of inner and outer love with you so that when you come out of it not only is your body completely changed, but your views about yourself are also completely changed to see the real-beautiful you. I told myself this and I will tell you this, though you may have heard it before: Love yourself first and the rest of the world will follow.
Being kind to yourself is the best gift you've got to give, dollface!
- How do you practice self-kindness and self-compassion?
- Why do you think girls and young women tend to be so self-critical?
- What needs to change to help self-compassion, self-respect, and self-love blossom and grow
I AM Ashley Drummonds. I am a health and fitness expert and use my own journey in fitness to empower women to embrace both their inner and outer strength through ABS (Authentic Beauty and Strength). I have a passion for connecting, educating, and helping women all over the world to build strong bodies, create healthy lifestyles, and fall in love with their own beautiful body! www.ashleydrummonds.com
Image via workingmomsagainstguilt.com