By Sophie Winik, Regular ContributorDecember 6, 2015
image via qoutesgram.com
I was the target of bullying when I was a child. I experienced emotional pain that a child should never have to feel. I was shy. I was polite. I wanted to make friends. But I was treated horribly. As an adult, I have experienced feelings of emotional abuse and have been bullied by fellow adults, and though it’s something that never feels good, no matter how old you are, I have learned how not to blame myself for other people’s actions. This piece is meant for those bullies. I want to acknowledge people who have been a bully to someone once in their life, has maybe said or done some mean things to hurt another person, and is someone that is willing to hear what I have to say.
I want to begin with the following quote by Dan Pearce, “Be real. Embrace that you have weakness. Because everyone does. Embrace that your body is not perfect. Because nobody’s is. Embrace that you have things you can’t control. We all have a list of them.” I am not here to blame anyone for his or her actions. I am not here to convince you to change your actions.
You have the choice and power to be who you want to be in life.
What I do want is for you to realize that I understand you. I understand that sometimes you didn’t mean to do or say what you did. I understand that sometimes you, too, feel vulnerable, and bullying another person is the only way you know how to express your emotions. I understand that it’s hard to sit back and not be in control of certain things in your life. I understand your feelings and that you feel like the bad guy in a movie who is hated by everyone surrounding him. I understand you. That, in itself, is all you really need to know in order to move on in life.
While some may not understand where your heart is and what you are thinking when you act in a certain way, I understand. I know that you may feel that bullying others is your way of escaping reality, but it isn’t. Whatever is going on in your mind, whatever you are feeling, bullying others is not the way to handle your feelings. It is hurtful, and while there are people who don’t care that you have a heart, I know you do.
I know you are a human being who just lost your way.
I know you have feelings and are just confused as to how to express them appropriately.
Think about the words I am sharing with you. Realize that I do not hate you. Understand that I am not blaming you. I am guiding you in order for you to understand that you are worthy of helping to inspire others. You don’t need to be perfect. Your flaws will make you that much more inspirational. Just as Robert Tew says, “There is no need to be perfect to inspire others…Let people get inspired by how you deal with your imperfections.”
Have you ever been bullied or bullied another? How did you move past it? How did you forgive and learn? Tell us below!
Sophie is a preschool teacher in Southern California. When she is not teaching the little ones she is writing stories about her experiences with bullying, with the hope that her words will help others stand up against bullying and be another voice to end the hate. Sophie is also an artist who loves to paint and draw and is studying to be an art therapist, specifically working with children. Check out her anti-bullying stories at kindrevolutioncampaign.wordpress.com.
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