By: Laura Bishop, Regular Contributor
Experiencing some form of loss can be one of the most difficult life experiences for many of us. I know this to be true in my case. I am sensitive by nature. I feel things so intensely at times that I’m convinced I can actually feel pieces of my heart breaking when grieving a loss.
Not too long ago, I was faced with a challenging situation, which rattled me to my core. I was in pain. I couldn’t stop crying. I was angry. I was sad. Then angry again. There were days when I didn’t want to get up and face the day. But no amount of sniffling or hiding under the covers was going to change what had happened. And checking out from my life was certainly not going to ease my heartache. As a result, I chose to walk through that experience and began to heal in a graceful manner. That didn’t mean I was kicking butt, or even looking my best. Let’s just say, waterproof mascara definitely came in handy during that period of time. Being graceful meant showing up, facing the day, and being true to myself about how I was feeling. In a nutshell, I allowed myself to feel my feelings. If I was sad, I embraced that sadness. When I was angry, I expressed that in a healthy way. I opened up to my girlfriends, shared my thoughts, and accepted that this was exactly where I was supposed to be in that moment.
There is no timetable when dealing with loss, and I can honestly say, there are moments even now, when I reflect on what I went through, that stirs up some residual pain. However, it’s only brief, and I let myself acknowledge whatever feelings come up for me today. Being on the other side of grief has been empowering. I now have a faith so strong, that I know I WILL BE OKAY NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS. For someone like me, who has struggled with fear (like many of us), and has let that fear dictate her choices, having this realization has been life changing.
If you’re going through something difficult, or dealing with loss, my heart goes out to you. I know you’ll be okay, stronger even. Meet yourself where you’re at. Don’t fight your feelings. Instead, lean into them, and show yourself a little kindness along the way. Find comfort in knowing that this too shall pass.
How do you cope with loss and hard times? What things have worked to heal and give you peace? Share your wisdom and inspiration here!
Laura is a Bay Area native, with a master’s degree in counseling/psychology. She loves helping others become the best versions of themselves. When she’s not working with clients, she can be found spending time with friends and family (especially her little goddaughter), practicing yoga, hiking, and baking cupcakes. She considers it an honor and a privilege to share her voice with the IATG community.
image via youaremyfave.com