Graduating Without Her

By Olivia Gardner, IATG Contributor May 20, 2016


April 17, 2014. It’s been almost two years,  yet I can still remember the weeks and days leading up to it. I remember everything as if it was yesterday, perhaps because I reminisce our last moments together quite often.

I remember the day you left physically, but never spiritually; the day I held your fragile, soft hands for three hours not wanting to let go until the time had truly come. The sunset that night was beautiful as if you were telling us you lived and loved, but now it was our turn to go out and live and love now too.

During fifteen of my seventeen years, she was here.

She was here making memories with me that I’ve held and kept onto.  She was the one with barbecue chips, raspberry sorbet, and baked beans in stock in the pantry every time my sisters and I went to visit up in the mountains. She was the one who would take us shopping and out on lunch dates just to be in each other’s presence. She always made sure to remind us “to save room for dessert” and that “what happens at Grandma’s stays at Grandma’s.” She was the one who would make us deviled ham sandwiches anytime we were going to the drive-in movies. I remember the nights when we would watch the discovery health channel while sitting in her TV room as Papa sat in his on the other side of the house. And how could I ever forget the countless trips we went on across the country or the times when I was sick,and she would come over to keep me well.

There is an endless list of memories we made together, and for that I’m thankful.

As I approach my high school graduation, I look back on the last seventeen years in admiration of the life I’ve lived. I look back on the days when my Grandpa would remind us when my Grandma was sick, that she wasn’t going anywhere, because she’ll make sure to be at graduation. But, as the day comes, I realize she won’t be there. I think of all that has happened in the last two years with her not here, and I know that everything she was there for in those fifteen years has helped me get to where I am today. She may not be in my life physically, but she walks with me and lives in my heart through it all.

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Have you ever lost someone close to you? How do you keep their memory alive in your heart? Tell us about it in the comments!

About Olivia:

FullSizeRender-2.jpgOlivia is a senior in high school from Colorado. She's involved with cross-country and is one of the captains for the girls' team. Sci-Tech also plays a big role in her life. Her blog about life and inspirations is

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  • commented 2016-07-09 07:10:07 -0700
    You are an inspiration to me. When I was 7 I lost my younger sister. It was a very hard time for our family but we got through it. As I graduated from 6th grade this year I looked at all of my family and cant help but think that someone is missing.

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