Getting Real about Self-Doubt

By: Kate Krassowski, Regular Contributor

“Those who don’t believe in magic, will never find it” –Roald Dahl

This week I started writing about hope, confidence, and beauty, but it all felt a little false to me. I didn’t really have hope that my life was going to work out and my confidence had been reduced to about the size of a peanut M&M. I have this quote on my mirror, it reads: “You are beautiful, you are capable, you are loved.” I felt like it was mocking me because I didn’t believe it at all. My clothes didn’t fit right, I was failing at my job, and I felt like I’d loved other people but wasn’t being loved in return. My rational head, of course, knows that none of that is true, but that doesn’t keep us from feeling those kinds of things. We over think and pick everything that happens to us apart until we go mad with “what ifs” and “whys.”

I went to see The Fault in Our Stars (No Spoilers!). There is a scene where the mother explains that when bad things happen to us or when we feel like getting out of bed is the worst task in the world, we still find a way to do it. We are programmed to keep moving because life demands it of us. The world doesn’t stop even when we want to. So we press on, we put one foot in front of the other and eventually each step is easier than the last. We discover something new about ourselves or we realize a new passion. We fall in love again or learn to appreciate that what we had to start with was all we ever needed. There is no limit to the possibilities that await us on the other side of our self-doubt.

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I wanted to erase the quote off my mirror so many times because I thought it was lying to me. But I didn’t, and it wasn’t. It pushed me forward because I hoped that one day I would believe it again. It’s easy to tell ourselves how awesome and loved we are when we feel it. The challenge comes when we are at our lowest point. And when that happens, although feeling forced, we need to remember to continue to lift ourselves up.  It’s like muscle memory. If you teach your muscles something over and over, they will remember, even when you’ve forgotten. When you lose sight how amazing you are, keep telling yourself you are anyway. You’re not lying to yourself; you’re just in a situation where it’s hard for you to see in it.

I want to encourage you, and myself, to believe in the magic of your life again. Believe in where you can take yourself and how you can overcome whatever the world throws at you. No one explains this better than Glinda from The Wizard of Oz, “You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.” It’s inside all of us, the will to live an extraordinary life, and we have the strength to continue even when we feel less than ordinary. The magic’s there; believe in it, with all your heart.

Let's Chat!

Pushing through self-doubt is a constant process, but totally worth it!

  • What do you do to combat self-doubt (inspirational quotes, mantras, activities)
  • Why do you think so many girls struggle with self-doubt? How can we change it?
  • What about Kate's story do you relate to? How did you change your perspective or actions?

 

About Kate

Kate_Byline-1.jpgShe moved to Los Angeles from Cleveland, OH after graduating with a B.A in Film Production from BGSU. She is passionate about speaking out against how women are viewed in the media and being part of changing it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Image via emergeintoyou.com

 

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