Fitting In and Feeling Different: Let’s Talk About It!

By: Purple Isosceles, IATG Guest Contributor February 24, 2016


We’re happy to welcome a guest blog by Purple Isosceles, 10-year-old co-star of the comic book Purple and Nine!

You know how your parents always tell you how “everybody is different in their special way”? Have you noticed it doesn’t help?

We all feel different from the other kids at certain times. Sometimes that’s a great feeling, like getting a gold star. But sometimes, when you get the gold star, other people might be jealous or make fun of you for being a goodie-two-shoes.

Everyone wants to feel special, but also everyone wants to feel like they belong. It’s pretty confusing.

Here are some ways I think about fitting in and helping other understand difference. Maybe they’ll work for you too!

About fitting in:

  • Remember that everyone wants to be treated with respect. If you are good to people, it will help you fit in, no matter how weird you are.

  • Identify the areas that aren’t important to you. For myself, it’s clothing. I don’t care what I wear, so I just go with whatever is “normal.” For other people, that’s important, so they have their own style. You have to decide for yourself what areas are not important to you, and in those areas, do things to feel like you belong.

  • It’s OK to go with the crowd unless it violates your principles. If my friends go to a princess movie, I’ll go, even though I prefer science movies. But if everyone is making fun of another kid, I won’t be part of that.

About being special:

  • Have at least one good friend who loves you for who you are. In a group, it is harder to be yourself, but that friend is your anchor. When other people don’t accept you, you know she is there for you.

  • Being nice isn’t always nice. I am too nice sometimes instead of saying something bothers me. You should be good to people, which means telling them the truth in a kind way. If you can’t tell the truth, people never get to know the real you. If think the other person “can’t take the truth” you are saying they are weak, which isn’t nice at all.

  • Share the things that are special about you. I love building things, and I share my inventions with other kids. If they’re interested, I show them how to make their own.

  • Don’t expect other people to approve or like the same things as you. If you like it, keep doing it whether they approve or not.  

When people are mean or don’t get that being different is OK:


I want people to feel comfortable talking about being different. I think it is OK for someone to ask me about my race. It should be OK to ask someone who is handicapped about how it makes them feel.

When we were little, it was OK to say anything. Grownups are uncomfortable because it’s not “polite” to point those things out. That’s just silly. I know I am a person of color, so it’s OK if someone asks me about it.

Instead of just asking, sometimes people make fun of other people. Some people criticize my hair and say it should be more curly or afro. I know, it sounds rude, but people send me mail about my hairstyle all the time. I realize they are just trying to help, or they want me to be more like them, so they can fit in. I remember the first rule of being good to everyone. I usually don’t ignore it, but explain to them how it is for me, so they will not have that ignorance or fear anymore.

Let’s Chat!

What are your “rules” about fitting in and being special? What is the hardest part for you about fitting in? If you want to ask someone about a racial difference or a disability, how do you approach them?


About Purple Isosceles

PURPLE_writer_bio.jpgPurple Isosceles co-stars in the comic book series “Purple and Nine”. She is 10 years old and loves robotics and skateboarding. She plays chess and the viola. Purple wears her hair in a bun because after animating her best friend, Nine, the 3D animator refused to do any more complicated hair animation. Visit Purple at , @Purple_Gangly and @GanglySister and on Facebook at  or You can get the comic books about Purple and Nine at


Every girl is a work in progress. If you need more help, click here.

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