By: Marissa Parks, Regular Contributor
Although I love it when my friends come to me for relationship advice, I recently realized that I’ve never been good at convincing them to show their true emotions in a situation. Instead, I usually tell them to keep their head up and just walk past the people that have hurt them. It wasn’t until I was in a situation where I guttered up my pride without expressing how I felt and walked out of a relationship (that later completely broke my heart) that I realized I had been giving relationship advice all wrong. You see, sometimes it’s easy to want to hurt the people who have hurt you, but that’s usually not the best case.
Sometimes telling people how we really feel is just too embarrassing. We worry about what others will think, how they will react, or how it will affect the relationship. Exhibit A: your significant other does something that upsets you, and instead of telling him that you’re upset, you find any way to get back at him.
Simply collect your thoughts and emotions and talk about the situation. Not only will you potentially fix the problem, but you will be letting your significant other know that you feel comfortable enough to tell them how you feel. Of course, this is a lot easier said than done and talking about your feelings is EXTREMELY difficult. But trust me, it will pay off in the end!
Not only will telling your significant other how you truly feel help the relationship, but it will help you come to terms with how you feel in the situation. You will be able to put your emotions into words and express what you’re feeling in certain circumstances. You won’t be holding any emotions back from them, and they will be able to understand where you’re coming from. Whoever is on the other end of the conversation should be able to respect what you say, because sometimes you cannot help what you feel, you just feel it. If they don’t respect what you feel, maybe it’s time for a new friendship.
So the next time you’re in a pickle, whether it be with a friend, family member, or significant other, say how you truly feel instead of looking for revenge or walking away from the friendship. It’s usually better to say too much than not enough.
And, always remember this quote. Keep it in mind to help give you a boost of self-confidence when you’re down.
“Always do what you want, and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
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Marissa Parks is a junior at Texas State University in San Marcos. Other than being a bobcat, she is a member of the Human Rights Campaign and a huge fan of HEB tortilla chips and breakfast tacos. She believes in helping women be the best they can be and equality for everyone. You will most likely find her floating the river, reading a book or hiking in Austin.
image via www.wattpad.com