Image courtesy of State.gov

Most young girls dream about their wedding. They fantasize about the theme, what friends will be in their wedding party and, of course, the dress. What they fantasize about most, however, is the person she’ll marry. She has a person that will be just right for her and will join her in her happily ever after. Sadly though, not all girls in the world get the wedding or the future they dream of.

In many countries around the world, arranged marriages are still practiced. Child brides are sent to marry men much older than themselves. One of these young girls is Reem Al Numery. Al Numery has received international recognition and was recently honored as one of Time’s 100 Most Influential People of 2010.

The now 14-year-old Yemeni girl was forced to marry her 30-year-old cousin in 2008 at the age of 12. Her father had arranged the marriage as an act of revenge against Al Numery’s mother who had left him. In Yemen, mothers do not have parental rights so the courts only recognize the father’s rights in issues concerning children.

Al Numery told U.S. Embassy officials that she voiced her opposition to the marriage. Her father would not stand for disapproval. He forced her into the marriage by gagging her and tying her up until she relented.

The marriage did happen. On the day of her wedding, Al Numery was desperate for some escape from her impending fate.

“While my hair was styled for the ceremony, I thought of ways to set fire to my wedding dress,” she says. After her wedding, she attempted suicide twice. She also was raped by her husband when she wouldn’t consent to sleeping with him. He choked, bit and dragged her into submission when she resisted him.

Somehow, Al Numery was able to escape her husband and began to publicly protest her marriage and those like it. Her protests gained an international audience including U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton who honored Al Numery with an International Women of Courage award last year. Because of the stir around her situation, Al Numery’s appeal for a divorce went before a Yemeni judge. He eventually granted her a divorce.

Al Numery was released from her father’s home and now lives with her mother and brother. Many girls are not as lucky as Al Numery. In Yemen, a girl’s education ends when she gets married; she also will most likely become a mother at a young age. However, girls who give birth before the age of 15 are five times more likely to die during childbirth than women who are older.

Al Numery and young activists like her are changing the international views about marriage as well as the worth of women and their education. It seems that slowly the international concept of women’s rights is taking flight.

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Nujood Ali is ten years old and divorced. Most girls in America will never have to fear this happening to them, yet it is something that young girls are experiencing all over the world. According to the International Center for Research on Women, more than 100 million girls under the age of 18 will be married off in the next decade if trends continue.

Child brides are not often talked about, but as women, we ought to be aware of the experiences of women worldwide. In February, Nujood, a Yemeni girl who likes playing hide-and-seek and tug-of-war with her family and friends, was sold by her parents to Faez Ali Thamer, a man in his mid-thirties, as a bride. Although her parents deny taking money from Faez for their marriage arrangement, most of Nujood’s community doubts this.

The International Center for Research on Women (ICRW) reports that child marriage is undeniably connected to poverty.  Statistics for child marriage in America pale in comparison to the rates in impoverished countries, though it still occurs.  The practice is most prevalent in developing countries and in communities with few economic resources.  Girls like Nujood are treated as commodities and as a result lose control of their lives.

After enduring physical and mental abuse from her husband, Nujood went to her parents, but because of cultural customs, they were unable to help her. It was Nujood’s aunt who advised Nujood to go to court by herself, and so she did. There, she was found by the judge who eventually granted her a divorce and put her in touch with Shada Nasser, who agreed to take Nujood’s case. Nasser, who is a leading women’s rights activist and lawyer in Yemen, took Nujood into her home and together these brave women accomplished what Nujood was told was impossible—they got her a divorce.

“We know a lot about the consequences of child marriage—from reinforcing cycles of poverty, to ending a girl’s education, to greater risk of suffering from domestic violence, to greater risk of range of  health problems resulting from early pregnancy,” says Kathleen Selvaggio, the Senior Policy Advocate of the ICRW.  The ICRW believes that ending child marriage must be a priority in the global effort to end violence against women.

For girls who are unable to escape from such a situation, the odds of them realizing their full potential as young women are extremely low.  In addition to losing authority over their futures, these girls are losing their childhoods, something which can never be reversed.  Nujood, who is looking forward to beginning the third grade, now has dreams of becoming a lawyer like Shada.  “I want to defend oppressed people,” she told the Los Angeles Times.  “I want to be an example for all the other girls.”  Every girl should have the freedom to have such a dream.

No child should have to fear that they will be sold, that their lives will be decided by others. If you want to know more about this and other important women’s rights issues, visit the International Center for Research on Women at www.icrw.org.

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