I woke up this morning at 6:47 in a complete state of panic. Immediately I was brought back to my sophomore year of college when my dysfunctional alarm clock gifted me an extra hour and half of sleep. Unfortunately, it was at the expense of my calculus final. We’ve all been there, right? You wake up and within four seconds you realized that your world is collapsing and the ever-dreaded, white rabbit from Alice and Wonderland reminds you, “You’re late!You’re late!”

I may not have been late for a final this morning, but I was well over an hour late to pick up one of my best friends to take her to the airport. My heart pounding I called her to apologize and offer to pay for the taxi she had to take instead. To my surprise, she too woke up and at the same time, we spit out a few four letter words and ended the call with, “Be outside. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

For the record it took thirteen minutes, but after the hellacious day I had yesterday, this compounded my frustration, more with myself than anything else. Of course, I drove rather illegally, too fast and too careless, but we made it to the airport only to see a line stretching down to the end of the terminal. LAX is notorious for horrific travel tales, delays and cancellations and this special day was no different. She hopped out of the car hopeful to be standby for the next flight, praying she not miss the concert, and the whole reason she was flying in the first place.

So I dropped her off and I drove for about nine minutes white knuckled on the steering wheel. Yes, I was still upset from the day before, but I was so angry at myself that I practically broke down crying in the car. I felt horrible for making her late and potentially making her miss a concert she had been anticipating for weeks. Two hours later, she called me to say she got on the next flight and everything was going to work out. It was in that moment that I realized, things happen and maybe the best method for dealing with slip-ups isn’t bashing your own self-esteem for hours. Maybe the same understanding and compassion we have for the people in our lives, we could extend to ourselves.

I know I’m my biggest critique, in fact, I think Simon Cowell lives inside my mind harshly judging every move I make. It’s hard to live up to those expectations.  Impossible, I’d venture to say. I need a little more Paula I think. Okay, maybe I woke up late and my best friend almost missed her flight; but the reality is she didn’t and things worked out. And in the mean time, I was creating a torture scene inside my mind unnecessarily. Ladies, we HAVE to be nicer to ourselves. Why can we be so loving, understanding, and compassionate to everyone but ourselves? Well, enough is enough.

Someone told me once, “I love you for what you can do, but I love you equally for what you can’t.” I think it’s time I start putting that into practice with myself.

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Love is quite possibly the single most documented emotion in the world between books, poems, movies, movements, wars, art and other mediums attempting to capture its true essence. Why then, with all of this documentation, can we not figure out better guidelines, or how to books, recipes, formulas, compasses or maps? Love is so illusive, yet it is the single greatest drive for a human being. Now as I started this blog, I had no real direction. I decided that to even tackle this concept meant I had to put my figures on keys and hope that by some divine intervention, fairy dust or imaginative inspiration something would hopefully spill out. I’m still waiting. Haha.

But honestly, one of my girlfriends was complaining recently about an ex-boyfriend who had cheated on her. She was devastated and her seemingly justifiable response was that she doesn’t believe in love. Immediately my heart felt as though it were going to stop mid-beat. I feel like Tinker Bell when she doesn’t have enough claps. Because ladies, we have all been there or have known someone who has and we simply can’t give up. It’s too easy to throw in the towel, to harden our hearts, to build a fortress to newcomers, put our hearts in storage and retire our love jersey. And trust me when I say I’m not preaching about this one, no soap box under my high heels.

I’m also not limiting this to dating relationships or boys. I’m talking about relationships in general and the love (or lack thereof) felt by so many. Maybe it’s a dad unable to show affection, a best friend who betrayed you, or a myriad of other situations. All I know is that love can be mistreated, manipulated, or lost and the beauty is that love is resilient. Love can grow where it once existed or from a place that has never known its presence. Love doesn’t leave unless we allow it to exit the premises and it comes quicker than Batman to the bat symbol in the sky when called upon.

So this is my cry for hope. Hang in there. I know you may have been knocked down, you may have been knocked down so many times at this point that you have every justification in the world to stay down for the count, but don’t; please get back up. Please believe with me, we can hold hands through this one, but we can’t give up. Fight for your heart, she deserves it, you deserve it. Love in the hands of imperfect people will quickly display characteristics of its host, but just because some people have given reason

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As soon as we turn 18, we are encouraged to vote. The 18-24 age range votes least in comparison to all other ages, which is tragic though understandable. Every story has two sides. Perhaps asking these young citizens to vote is asking a lot. It’s understandable that there are more voters passed the age of 24 than there are younger ones. The young age range is a very transitional, life-affirming stage and voting is sometimes the last thing we want to think about.

In the 2004 election, 51.5% of 18-24 year-old Americans registered to vote. Of them, 41.9% actually voted. Young voters may likely come around this upcoming election as Barack Obama is bringing a new and exciting face to American politics – a change, if you will. The issue, then, arrives at sustainability. If the opportunity to vote is neither new nor exciting, then, do we vote?

While admirable, organizations like Rock the Vote are missing a key fact – at this age, voting doesn’t always make the priority list. I’m assuming when you turn 18 the first you think is, LEGALLY AN ADULT! Not VOTING, yes! Am I wrong?

I am 20 years old and I have voted in every election since I was capable of doing so – which is 3 (including the very thrilling primaries earlier this year). I think voting is a right I was given and I am going to take advantage of that. I am neither an activist nor a political junkie, but I think I am capable of voting. However, the decision is not as simple for all young voters.

In the very critical and fragile time of being 18-24 years old, a lot is going on. You’re getting out of high school – HUGE transition – and maybe going to/applying for college. Some are applying for grad school, entering the real world, and may even be starting families. If you don’t call those stressful times, I don’t know what are. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), teen pregnancy rates in the US rose in 2007 for the first time in 14 years. Teen moms have concerns outside of registering to vote and casting their ballots. Sometimes when there’s a lot going on, it’s hard to look at the bigger picture. Issues of finances, jobs, education, and family become immediate. Voting is something that looks into the future when many only have time to look at right now.

It’s important to have the knowledge and maturity to vote and many potential young voters haven’t attained that yet. A politician who speaks directly to our age group and talks to us about what we need to do would really help. Why go out and vote if you don’t know why you’re voting for the things you are? If you don’t know the difference between McCain and Obama, come November, I don’t think you should vote. And if you can’t appreciate what voting is right now, wait. What’s the point of doing so otherwise?

Voting at a young age is expecting a lot. Sometimes our immediate here-and-now lives take first priority and we forget about the greater good of the nation and the future. It’s not wrong; it just is. But it’s important to take time and think about that bigger picture because the future that seems so far away may come sooner than you think.

photo by theresa thompson

2004 election, 2008 election, mccain, obama, vote Hide

As we prepare for the presidential elections this fall, IATG wants to highlight some key issues that we, ourselves, wanted to know more about.  The first in this series is healthcare.  47 million people are living without healthcare, and 1 in 3 of the uninsured are 18-24. Where do these candidates stand on the issue of healthcare?

McCAIN-Individual Insurance

The Facts:
* $2,500 tax credit for individuals and $5,000 for families for health insurance. This would make corporate health benefits unnecessary but still leaves the jobless uninsured.
* Quotable: “Families should be able to purchase health insurance nationwide, across state lines, and their policy should follow them from job to job.”
* Would increase awareness of and promote the use of existing children’s health insurance programs while expanding community health centers.
* Encourage faster production of generic drugs. This would create more market competition with the plan of lowering drug costs.
* According to his website: Would “pass medical liability reform that eliminates lawsuits directed at doctors who follow clinical guidelines and adhere to safety protocols”
* Says he will work with governors to help states create plans to lower costs for those with pre-existing conditions.

Concerns:
*No requirements for health-care providers to cover those with preexisting conditions; no government limits on how much they can charge these patients.
*By allowing citizens to buy health care in any state, many fear that health-care companies may move their headquarters to states with less stringent consumer protection laws.
*The tax credit will only grow at about 2% per year, whereas the amount we pay for insurance grows at about 7% a year; though McCain argues that his plan will reduce the price of insurance through competition.
* The average family policy now costs $13,000 annually and the tax credit is only $5,000 for families.
* No specific plan for young adults without coverage.

How do we pay for this?
* Taxes on those who decide to keep their employer-provided health insurance.

OBAMA-Building on Employer-Provided Health Care

The Facts:
* Says: “Employers that do not offer or make a meaningful contribution to the cost of quality health coverage for their employees will be required to contribute a percentage of payroll toward the costs of the national plan.”  Small businesses will be exempt and receive a tax credit to reduce the cost of providing health care.
* The National Plan: will have benefits similar to the health care plans offered to members of congress (including guaranteed eligibility despite pre-existing conditions; preventive, maternity and mental health benefits).
* If you can’t afford the national plan, you’ll get a subsidy that corresponds to how much you make.
* Young adults can remain on their parents health insurance until 25 to be covered by parents (most plans now require a student to be enrolled in school full-time) in case their post-college jobs don’t provide the benefit.

Concerns:
* Does not require coverage for all adults, only children– this is the big point of contention with Obama’s plan: many believe that coverage for adults should be mandated.
* We do not know how much the subsidies will be for those that can’t afford the national plan.
* Though Obama promises to make plans affordable, we do not know how affordable.
* Some argue that the “Pay-or-play” system is unfair- this refers to Obama’s idea of having states use taxes to make employers pay, or avoid the fee by providing health care or coverage to their workers (play).

How do we pay for this?
* Obama plans to eliminate tax cuts for those earning over $250,000 a year and tax employers who do not provide insurance for their workers

FOOD FOR THOUGHT:

“The stock Democratic health reform solution, before Bill Clinton changed it, was a play-or-pay employer mandate, and that’s exactly what Barack Obama has.  And in 1992, the favorite GOP solution was tax credits to buy private health insurance. So, a lot of things have happened in 16 years; the health care system is much worse than it was, but we pretty much have the same solutions that we’ve always had.”
Jonathan Oberlander, a professor of health politics and policy at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and expert on the presidential health care plans

Both candidates say very little about what they will do to solve this issue.  Write in and ask them how they will help you get health insurance!
www.johnmccain.com
www.barackobama.com

2008 election, health insurance, healthcare, mccain, obama Hide

In summer of 2005, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants opened in theaters to a modest $9.8 million.  Based on Ann Brashares’ best-selling series, the studio expected to draw fans of the books, but certainly not fans of the relatively unknown cast.  So why make a sequel to a film that only grossed $40 million?  Well, fast-forward three years and take a look at the cast now.  Amber Tamblyn, America Ferrera, Blake Lively and Alexis Bledel are all grown up and blossoming into full-blown stars.

Best known for her roles on General Hospital and Joan of Arcadia, Golden Globe and Emmy-nominee, Amber Tamblyn, was one of the more well-known of the girls when the original film was released.  Since then, she has continued her jump from the small to the big screen, starring in The Grudge 2. She will next be seen with Amy Poehler in the comedy Spring Breakdown and recently wrapped on the remake of 1956 noir classic Beyond a Reasonable Doubt, starring opposite Michael Douglas.

At the time of Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants’ release, America Ferrara was only recognizable for her role in the critically-acclaimed indie film Real Women Have Curves.  However, in 2006 Ferrara landed the lead in the ABC pilot for Ugly Betty, which has become one of the most popular shows on television and thrust this 24- year old into the spotlight.   Over the last two years, Ferrara has been honored for her portrayal of “Betty,” including an Emmy Award, a Golden Globe Award and an additional Golden Globe nomination.  She is also up for another Emmy for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series, which will be presented at the Primetime Emmy Awards on September 21st.

In 2005, Blake Lively was a true unknown, considering the original film was her first shot at a leading role.  Since then, Lively has become a household name as she has gone on to star in the hit series Gossip Girl, as privileged prep school girl, Serena Van Der Woodsen.  The role earned her two Teen Choice Awards: Choice TV Actress and Female Breakout Star.  Among her upcoming projects is the romantic drama New York, I Love You and The Private Lives of Pippa Lee, in which she stars with Keanu Reeves and Julianne Moore.  (Lively will be back in the role of Serena in the second season of Gossip Girl premiering September 1st on the CW.)

After making her television debut on Gilmore Girls in 2000, Alexis Bledel was by far the most recognizable of the original film’s cast.  In addition to seven seasons on the hit show and several Teen Choice and Young Artist Award wins and nominations, Bledel also played a lead role in Frank Miller’s Sin City.  She can soon be seen starring in the feature comedy The Post-Grad Survival Guide, set for a 2009 release, and is currently filming The Good Guy.

Despite the moderate success of the first film, with a cast that has gone on to become so accomplished in such a short time, it is no surprise that Sisterhood would warrant a sequel or that this time the girls would trump the pants.  This is perhaps most evident in the films’ marketing and posters.  The one-sheet to the 2005 film featured a young girl wearing jeans with a small picture of the four girls sticking out of her back pocket.  This time around, the poster is composed of only the four girls’ faces.  Though the jeans still play a central role in the story, they now function as a vehicle to connect the girls as they learn more about themselves as individuals.

In just a week in theaters, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 has grossed more than half of the original film’s total box office and will surely surpass its predecessor by the end of its run.  While this film may not have seemed like a shoe-in for a sequel, a cast of smart, strong, and recently successful young actresses, is certainly luring young women into theaters.  After all, those dirty old jeans may be so three years ago, but talented female role models will never go out of style!

alexis bledel, amber tamblyn, america ferrera, amy poehler, ann brashare, blake lively, gilmore girls, good guy, gossip girl, joan of arcadia, julianne moore, keanu reeves, post-grad survival guide, private lives of pippa lee, real women have curves, sin city, sisterhood of the traveling pants, spring breakdown, the grudge 2, ugly betty Hide

I have to admit that one of the things I struggle with the most is asking for help. For some reason, I think it makes me look like I don’t know what I’m doing, shows weakness or just makes me look dumb. However, recently, I have learned that it’s quite the opposite. Having the confidence to actually admit that you have no clue what you are doing not only allows someone the opportunity to help you, but then you actually get somewhere instead of painting a fake facade that you have it altogether. I finally realized that it boiled down to two options, my pride or my company’s success. Easy choice. I now ask for help, from anyone, from everyone for that matter and I am shameless in my approach.

Ever since this epiphany, I swear that I have been a magnet to major CEO’s; whether it’s sitting next to one in a restaurant, calling in a favor from one of my parent’s friends or the guy I start chatting with in Coffee Bean, I swear it’s like they are following me. In all honesty, I have been unbelievably grateful to how much the universe tuned into my plea for marketing help and the marketing gurus that have practically shown up at my door step. Keep in mind that while people can serendipitously be placed in your life, it’s really up to you once the opportunity presents itself.

In the past, I would have smiled and thought, wow, I could really use their help but not said a word. Now, it’s the opposite, I can’t STOP talking and asking questions. As I said before, I am shameless about asking a total stranger if they have time for me to buy them coffee and pick their brain. And what’s incredible is not one person has said no to me yet. You’d be surprised how happy people want to share their success stories. What’s more flattering that that anyway? Basically you’re telling someone that you deeply admire what they have achieved in their life and would love nothing more than a bit of their time to hear what they obviously did very right in life. Worse case scenario they say no; and who cares if they do? You’ll never see them again.

Today, for instance, I met an incredible man literally sitting in Coffee Bean. He just so happened to own a HUGE marketing company and he selflessly spent two hours out of his busy schedule to pass on eons of wisdom, advice, suggestions and contacts. There’s no reason to reinvent the wheel ladies. Experience is priceless; it’s where all the mistakes are made and if someone is successful, it means they not only made their mistakes, but more importantly, they learned from them. So LEARN from their mistakes, pick their brain. I don’t believe that success is just by chance – I’m at least not leaving mine up to that. Find as many successful people as possible and stack them around you. Ask them everything you can imagine and bounce ideas off them. You have nothing to lose. As one man told me, “Fly with the eagles, not with the sparrows.”

Sure I can spend the next ten years of life fumbling around a dark jungle tripping over everything in my path and running into tree after tree; but I can also grab a flashlight and cover the same amount of distance in a fraction of the time while avoiding most of the serious obstacles. I don’t know about you, but I prefer the flashlight.  So next chance you get, be bold, ask for help. You’ll be shocked how many people would be honored to be your flashlight.

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Clothes are the most basic form of self-expression.  For many women, they have become the most important form of self-expression.  They are marketed to us in just this way: wear this and you’ll appear professional and conservative; wear this and you’ll appear sexy; wear this and you’ll appear to have no style whatsoever and people will think you’re lame (and if it’s lame enough, maybe you’ll actually get back around to cool).  We break our banks and carefully accessorize outfits so no one (God forbid) sees us in the same outfit twice. It’s dress up for adults – a world that allows us to appear in any role we want.

The newest, most-lucrative trend in the world of fashion is couture for kids.  Top designers like Juicy Couture are rapidly creating lines for both young girls and boys.  Play Couture, a new store in Beverly Hills, sells designers such as Diesel, Paul Frank, Lacoste and more high-end brands like IKKS for ages 7-16.  Play’s website touts their store as a “haven” for the “bratty, fashion-obsessed preadolescent.”  But who’s paying for these expensive items?  And why?

Jody Thomas, a mother from Colorado explains that children are not brand-oriented by nature.  “As my kids have gotten older, we are actually spending less,” she says.  “I may love the expensive little swing raincoat with the brown and pink oversize polka dots and pink trim; my daughter is indifferent to it.  My son, likewise, will love anything with a dinosaur on it.”  Thomas insists that she only buys couture for fit, quality and classic design (so that it may be worn repeatedly), and for children, these qualities are null. “They have no figure flaws and they will outgrow clothing before they outwear it.”

Breny Mendoza, a women’s studies professor and mother, explains these marketing tactics and their motivations. “These industries need to rely on the purchasing power of the wealthy and create new lines of products to make up the declining purchasing power of the middle class.”  Mendoza admits that parents have always found pleasure in dressing their children up, but questions this obsession with expensive items.  “Does it have to be with luxury items?”  She explains that this kid-sized status symbol market plays off the Hollywood baby boom.  “Buying Juicy Couture brings you closer to Angelina Jolie.  These pricey products are serving mainly adult fantasies of wealth, and not those of the children.”

But the message sent to young girls when they are encouraged to be bratty, demanding, and label-hungry is that expensive clothes bring attention, revere and acceptance.   Mendoza insists that these messages carry over into adulthood and can severely damage a woman’s understanding of herself.  “You are what you shop,” Mendoza says of the lesson parents are teaching their children with these extravagant clothes.  “Having is better than being.”

While this message certainly applies to young boys as well, Mendoza insists the growing fashion obsession in women can be demotivating.  “I have no doubt that the obsession with fashion is the new form of oppression of women and a way to depoliticize women.”   She urges women to think before they shop and asserts that brand-craving certainly should not be encouraged at such an early age.    “Shopaholics, anorexics, depression, all these diseases that affect mostly young women are somehow related to the fashion industry.”

Being a woman today requires a careful balance between our visceral, often culturally-created desire for beauty, and our most important goal: building ourselves up as women of substance.  Children are not accessories, and neither are we.  When I was in junior high, and I begged my mother to let me start shaving my legs, she told me repeatedly, “You have the rest of your life for that.  Why start now?”  We have the rest of our lives to figure out that balance, and let’s face it, we have a hard enough time remembering that bags and shoes don’t need to be the reason we command attention in a room.  Let kids be kids.

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The other night, five of my best friends got all dolled up and attended a big, red carpet, fashion show in Hollywood. To be honest, it felt like we were all getting ready for prom and there’s nothing better than getting your hair done, throwing on your latest wardrobe purchase and a fabulous pair of heels. Now don’t get me wrong, I can watch football and eat a sloppy burger with the best of them but I equally enjoy playing Cinderella with all my best girlfriends for an evening out on the town.

Last night I was reminded how lucky I am to be surrounded with amazing, supportive girlfriends. Rather than spend our time wastefully discussing our “flaws,” we’re all about showering one another with compliments and not allowing the receiver of the compliment to say anything but “thank you.” My mom used to always say how important it was to learn how to receive a compliment with grace. We are working on that, even though I am well aware of the fact that it doesn’t necessarily come naturally to most girls.

You have to find confident women who truly are not threatened by one another and are dedicated to being encouraging and supportive, and who hold you accountable to be the same. It is much more fun to spend the drive over basking in your own beauty, discussing your strengths, why you look hot and have your best friends doing the same. While there is a fine line between cocky and confident, I think there is nothing wrong with acknowledging each other’s beauty! Plus on the scale between cocky and confidence, I think girls today have a LONG way to go before we’re pushing the envelope.

Plus your girlfriends know who you are and that you’re not some pretentious girl, completely full of herself so why shouldn’t we have a little sanctuary where all we do is encourage one another. Trust me, in attending a fashion show with girls that weigh as much as my left thigh, you HAVE to bolster your confidence and walk in feeling like a million bucks anyway!

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Sorry I’ve been away for a bit. I was most recently in Egypt for two weeks and, to no one’s surprise, internet was not as readily accessible as it is here in the States. Needless to say, I feel like I always return from my worldly travels different in some way as though my paradigm underwent refurbishing. This trip was one of the most eye-opening because, for the first time, I had an intimate cultural experience not only with the Egyptian culture, but more importantly with its residents. Now I could easily spend this time writing endlessly about the breathtaking geography, mystically archaic cities and leviathan pyramids but I’d rather discuss the people. I find that people tend to be the heart and lungs of a culture, the sweet center of a cinnamon roll and, for me, the most fascinating aspect to my travels.

In my travels, I have also found how often my definition of normal is challenged and I have cultivated a heightened tolerance for accepting things as different, not as wrong. For instance, in China, using chopsticks was an interesting challenge, but not inferior to our “fork concept.” In Tibet, their consumption of yak, though comparable to ours of cow, is simply different and, in Spain, their mid day naps (siestas) are a brilliant concept the States has yet to adopt. Working at a summer camp in Egypt, I was privileged to see a country truly from the eyes of its inhabitants. The girls I worked with were 16-18 and they were incredible.

A few things you don’t know about Egyptian girls: they are absolutely hysterical ( I swear they have sense of humor built into their DNA); they are not supposed to date until much later than we are; they are an incredibly inviting culture, very affectionate, and seem to smile the majority of the time. One interesting cultural comparison was that they are not encouraged to pursue their dreams as much as they are encouraged to pursue a viable career. I came home with a heightened appreciation for living in the land where “dreams come true.” I think it’s easy to take for granted that my parents convinced me that my dreams were boundless and I could pursue anything my little heart desired. I think it’s this freedom that defines the United States and one of the things we don’t appreciate enough. For me, it’s little jewels of priceless wisdom that make traveling imperative.

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After recently witnessing the hilarity of the Pineapple Express talent/ filmmaker panel at Comic Con, I had high expectations for this film.  Unfortunately, it just wasn’t as dope as I had hoped.  

Written by Superbad’s Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, Pineapple also stars Rogen in the film as Dale Denton, a process server who smokes his way through his lazy days.  The only reason he ever visits pot dealer, Saul Silver (James Franco), is to buy a strain of weed called Pineapple Express.  When Dale accidentally witnesses a murder by a crooked cop and drug lord, he panics and leaves his joint at the scene.  Paranoid the murderers will be able to trace the rare weed back to them, Dale and Saul run for their lives.  Forced together by these unlikely circumstances, we watch the duo’s friendship develop and laughter ensues as they try not to get killed – or kill each other.

On the up side, the action sequences in this film are pretty impressive, though the fake blood can be a bit corny and over the top at times.  The performances are overall stellar as Rogen and Franco shine individually and as a team.  They capture their stoner characters and their chemistry and comedic timing is flawless.

That said, the flaws in this film seem to stem from the script.  While Pineapple has key scenes that are undeniably funny, overall the comedy was not consistent enough to keep my attention for the almost two hours of screening.  More importantly, like Step Brothers, which was released last month and also a product of the Apatow comedy troupe, Pineapple proves that something about grown men who are completely immature is just not that funny.  We’ve seen it work in films like Old School but, by now, the premise has grown tired.

That Girl Says: Like It!  It may not be meet the high expectations of Superbad and Knocked Up fans, but as far as summer comedies go, Pineapple Express, may be a ride worth taking.  I wasn’t exactly McLovin’ it, but this joint can provide a laugh or two for even sober audiences.

Release Date:  August 6th, 2008 (Wide)
Running Time:  111 minutes
Rated:  R
Company:  Columbia Pictures
Cast:  Seth Rogen – Dale Denton
James Franco – Saul Silver
Director:  David Gordon Green
Official Site:  www.ridetheexpress.com

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